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First-century Christians knew what it meant to be in real community with one another, relating with a depth and commitment that made the description “body of Christ” a perfect metaphor for the church. So what’s the secret to church growth? Real community experienced in small groups.

Unfortunately, many churches mistake friendliness, courtesy or sociability with community. But that’s just the lowest common denominator. Jesus had something very different in mind for the Church when he sent the Holy Spirit on the day of Pentecost.

A handful of believers who were part of the early Church had firsthand experience with Jesus. They heard him speak and watched how he lived. What were his marching orders to them? “Love each other, just as I have loved you” (John 13:34). That was central to everything he wanted his followers and the Church to be.

What are the marching orders of a leader in regard to group dynamics? They all begin with the command to “love one another” and are scattered throughout the New Testament in the form of “one another” statements. One of the primary responsibilities of a spiritual guide is to model and encourage group members to live out these commands through relationship. What would that look like?

A group that is living out the one another’s in community…

• Honors one another and takes delight in doing it (Rom. 12:10);
• Lives in harmony—doesn’t think they are better than other people or that they know it all (Rom. 12:16);
• Doesn’t condemn others and isn’t critical (Rom. 14:19);
• Builds up each other (Rom. 14:19);
• Accepts each other (Rom. 15:7);
• Isn’t self-serving, but serves one another in love (Gal. 5:13);
• Shares each other’s burdens (Gal. 6:2);
• Is kind, tenderhearted and forgives each other (Eph. 4:33);
• Makes allowances for each other’s faults and forgives when offended (Col. 3:13);
• Teaches and counsels each other with godly wisdom (Col. 3:16);
• Encourages each other (1 Thes. 5:11);
• Thinks of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works (Heb. 10:24);
• Confesses their sins to each other and prays for each other (James 5:16);
• Extends sympathy, is tenderhearted and humble, and never retaliates (1 Pet. 3:8-9).

The best way to live out the instructions Jesus left us, is to practice them in a group context. Small groups give us real people with real issues where we can practice the love of God and the “one another’s” in a real way.

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